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The spiritual messages behind feeling alone and disconnected

Do you feel out of place? … Do you yearn to belong?

Many people struggle with feeling out of place in the world. Helpless to change their circumstances and the way in which society operates; they identify with oppression and being victims of external pressures. Without hope, they feel utterly disconnected from Source.

Feeling alone and disconnected happens to all of us. Personal and work related issues are often the stressors that destabilize our sense of centre and well-being, and especially when we’re challenged by unfamiliar circumstances. I like to think of these stressors as gifts – an opportunity to open ourselves to what is wanting to emerge in the situation. It’s a time to welcome all aspects of our feelings, thoughts, and beliefs to dissolve holding-patterns and expectations.

Resistance is just resistance – it isn’t the truth

I worked with a young couple who didn’t want to be part of the world. They despised humanity for the suffering and pain caused onto others, for the way in which the environment is compromised, and for all the indifference and misuse of power, as well as for their own struggle to belong. In many ways they were rejecting the world. As a consequence, they struggled to find their way in life and experienced so much pain – the pain that comes from rejecting the world.

The guidance they received centered on “showing up” while their survival instincts wrestled to escape from life, not become immersed into society. They wanted out and guidance wanted them in, especially into their bodies.

This is when as a healer I trust the guidance and in what is wanting to emerge in the face of adversity and resistance. Resistance is just resistance – it isn’t the truth. The truth is, this young couple want to belong, to find a place in the world where they fit in; where they feel safe. They both don’t feel safe in the world, and as a healer I  address that.

You need to feel in order to heal

How do you go to the heart of insecurity, or reach beyond the fear and pain when there is so much resistance? Gently, carefully and with empathic sensitivity, unless life throws you all in the deep end. Then you swim in the intensity of feeling, in the weight of disbelief, and in the muddy waters of conditioned limitations, with utter trust and devotion. Only this way can layer upon layer of karmic and ancestral imprinting come undone and release you to discover who you really are.

Circumstances push us to feel because we need to feel in order to heal, in order to connect with our resilience, inner power and truth, and ultimately to shine the light of who we truly are.

Dissolving attachment into love

What struck me in the session with the young couple was their attachment to not belonging, and the level of pain that they each felt due to not belonging. We can be so attached to our pain. It’s in releasing the pain that we feel more meaningful and real. As a healer, I hold a sacred space for that to happen and I give my utmost trust to every person’s natural pace for transformation, even if that means challenging them. I believe in people enough to see through them and engage with their potential for honesty and courage.

I know from experience that letting go is not easy, yet life necessitates it and will push us until we release. Our spiritual emergence pushes, pulls, guides, breaks open the closed doors within us. We are meant to open and let the light of Divinity through us. We are meant to love this world.

We are here to surrender and evolve the collective unconscious

It’s important to understand that we are not exempt from society; we are intrinsically a part of it. We are part of the collective unconscious and the only way to become conscious is not through rejection and judgement, but in loving the collective unconscious – in loving humanity! How else can we heal and be whole but to welcome all that we are? By loving who we are in the world, we give the world and ourselves the love we need, and our loving embrace lifts consciousness to greater levels of freedom and peace.

Masiandia says, “Everything, everything, everything… needs love.” Even our resistance, fear, anger, desperation. Especially our resistance, fear, anger and desperation. How can we surrender to our Divinity if we suppress our dark emotions and cast blame onto the world?

Welcoming every facet of you is the key to personal power, confidence and peace,
and a guiding hand is indispensable!

Tap into priceless guidance and spiritual wisdom in my book
Mystical Intimacy, available in print and e-book at, and at Banyen Books 



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