Life lessons are the pathways that best serve our soul evolution, which we undertake when we incarnate in human form. In the book Spiritual Psychology, Steve Rother has detailed descriptions of twelve life lessons, each pertaining to a primary and secondary lesson that we need to master in our lives. Life lessons decree the overall manifestations of all our experiences, coalescing within the framework of what we are here to learn – to master, in order to accomplish our life purpose. Mastery is a daily practice, it is a choice we make on a regular basis that support us to live more fulfilling lives, expressing the essence of our spirit being in physical reality.
I have interpreted and re-arranged some of Steve Rother’s material with Masiandia’s guidance, creating short descriptions of each lesson. Some of the lesson names have remained the same though some have changed with Masiandia’s request. Some people have one or two primary lessons, and one or two secondary lessons, while others may only have primary lessons. The secondary life lesson supports the first, interrelating with the primary lesson as a partner. In this way a system is created between life lessons to maintain equilibrium of growth. For persons who only have one primary lesson, with no secondary lesson, it induces a very concise and focused learning approach. Steve Rother’s book goes into further details, clarifying the roles of the primary and secondary life lessons.
Muscle testing / Kinesiology
You may want to muscle test to define which is your primary and secondary life-lesson, or you can create a chart and use a pendulum to test with.
To learn how to muscle test you can go to Michaelle Small Wright’s website: http://www.perelandra-ltd.com/Kinesiology-Self-Testing-Steps-W75C795.aspx
Twelve Life Lesson
Acceptance (Acknowledging Value)
Adaptation (Change Agent)
Be-ing (Wholeness)
Centring (Energy Balance/Boundaries)
Charity (Harmony)
Communication (Heartfelt Expression)
Creation (Holding Power)
Grace (Harmony)
Integrity (Authenticity)
Love (Transformation)
Trust (Trusting Self)
Truth (True To Self)
Acceptance (Acknowledging Value)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn Self-Acceptance or Self-Esteem and the Art of Graceful Acceptance.
Behaviour: When balanced, they allow for natural flow of energy and take responsibility for their own reality. When out of balance, they tend to be fixated on destination, and not accept life circumstances. This is when they try to do everything right but still nothing seems to work.
Core issue: Profound feelings of being unsafe and unhappy can overwhelm them. Because of this they may get caught up in drama and self-sabotage, and act as though they are victims.
Core Belief: They have a fundamental belief in being unworthy.
Practice: “Prayer: There is so much waiting to happen naturally in life in the silence of prayer, meditation, relaxation and comfort. Enter into the quietness, surround yourself with quietness, especially in your mind” ~ Masiandia
Adaptation (Change Agent)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to adjust and become comfortable with change.
Behaviour: When balanced, they enjoy spontaneity, and exploration of new places, new ideas and new ways of doing things, therefore effecting change for the betterment of whatever they are a part of. They are also clear thinkers, making decisive and clear choices. When out of balance, they have difficulty coinciding heart with head; leaning towards thinking instead of feeling. Thus they tend to control their environments and people in their lives, including themselves.
Core Issue: They have a profound desire for change; yet oftentimes feel very stuck in life, as they fear the unknown. They also desperately seek connections with others.
Core Belief: They may equate giving up control with being powerless, and can feel like they are alone in the world, unloved and unwanted.
Practice: “You are ‘naturally’ a change agent, needed in this world, in your family, work, relationships….You must reach out of your comfort levels to effect change by asking for what you want. Risk! By doing so, you invite others to do the same; you give them permission to grow.” ~ Masiandia
Be-ing (Wholeness)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to recognise their wholeness in the illusions that conspire to make them believe otherwise, and find sacred space within, and learn to fully love themselves.
Behaviour: When balanced, they feel whole and purposeful in their relationships with others, and with themselves. When out of balance, they have a tendency towards looking for external things in order to make them feel better, such as with addiction & obsession to substance abuse, materialism, and higher achievement, as well as with striving for personal perfection. Some will have a tendency to lean too heavily on relationships and validation as evidence of their worth.
Core Issue: They can feel deeply alone, abandoned, and separate from God. They have a natural propensity to seek for God in spiritual practices, as they have a desire to discover more, that there is more to life than meets the eye.
Core Belief: They imagine that they are not whole; that something is missing in them.
Practice: “Any and all spiritual practices serve you very well, as long as they are not dogmatic. Free yourself to ‘be’ who you really are is an understatement. Free yourself to just ‘be’ all, be everything, be God, be divine, be the earth, the air, the water and fire. Be everything! And so everything in the world gravitated to you to just ‘be’ with you, so that you can be together in harmony or disharmony. It doesn’t matter, as long as you just allow yourself to ‘be’ without needing to change anything and anyone, especially yourself.” ~ Masiandia
Centering (Energy Balance/Boundaries)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to express individuality through boundaries, balance energies, and place themselves first before everyone else, in order to have even more to give to others.
Behaviour: When balanced, they are predisposed to being healers with great emotional empathy. They are very sensitive to energy, and tap into other people’s emotions, thoughts and patterns. This creates an intuitive, mystical and intimate connection to others. When out of balance, they often do not realize when it is not their own energy that they are feeling. This compromises their health and challenges communication with others.
Core issues: With acute empathy and sensitivity, they are prone to having no concept of where their energy ends and another’s begin. They have difficulty setting boundaries; saying ‘no’, so they can attract manipulators in their lives.
Core belief: They tend to believe that they are flawed and incomplete, that something is missing in them, and they often imagine that everything is their fault.
Practice: “Defining your values is of greatest essence in your life. Know who you are and what you want, which for most of you requires expert help by professional healers, counsellors, therapists, and teachers, to support your healing journeys. Surround yourselves with like-minded people to build a solid foundation. Home-sense of community is very important to you; please be generous towards yourself and allow yourself to need what you need, so that your needs can be met.” ~ MAsiandia
Charity (Harmony)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to honour ‘connection’ to all people, and practice this in all actions. When applying charity, one must honour one’s own energy. Fill thy well to overflowing.
Behaviour: When balanced, they have a profound desire and ability to connect with people, and the things that they love, in a meaningful and life-affirming way. When out of balance, they lack connection with self and others, through depression, self-criticism and self-neglect. They are prone to seeing themselves as separate, as not fitting in with the world.
Core issues: They have difficulty getting their needs met, thus can become self-centred in their attempts to gain what they need, or they over-compensate by caring for other people’s needs, sacrificing their own. They may develop a sense of emptiness when faced with the needs of the world, and establish coping mechanism for survival.
Core beliefs: They can believe that in order to have what they need, others must like them. Because of this, some tend towards co-dependency. And they think that they are not allowed to claim their own influential characteristics, thus they disbelieve in their natural resources.
Practice: “There is more to life than meets the eye. Everyone really loves you when you let them. You’re whole ‘being’ is an invitation for love, care, respect, and authenticity. Pay close attention to all the love that comes your way, so that you can celebrate it. That is what you’re here to do – celebrate all life, all the time.” ~ Masiandia
Communication (Heartfelt Expression)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to communicate from the heart defined within relationship, especially primary relationships. The object is to not complete oneself with another, but rather to learn to walk alongside one another and share life together. This is significant in relationship with one’s self, to complete oneself.
Behaviour: When in balance, they are advocates for emotional truth, supporting clear expression of inner value for themselves and for others. When out of balance, they tend to be emotionally unavailable, or struggle to connect with others, and they can feel very inadequate. In extremes, they are adept at blending-in with others in order to hide, ie: by being agreeable and tolerant. Or conversely, they are incapable of interacting with others for fear of intimacy; therefore they may shy away or impose their needs onto others.
Core issues: They have a profound fear of connecting inwards to sensory feelings and expressing emotions. Strong identification with masculinity, and associated beliefs that femininity is weak, therefore expressing emotions is a sign of weakness.
Core belief: They are inclined to fearing ridicule for expressing viewpoints that differ from others, or when expressing what they need.
Practice: “Balancing masculine/feminine energy is essential for you, to support clear and whole expression of truth, and to fully enjoy a deeply loving union of yin/yang energies within yourself. Through chi-gong, meditation, and self-awareness practices, observe when you associate with male energy and when you relate to feminine energy, to more fully claim your power and value.” ~ Masiandia
Creation (Expressing Self-Power)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to balance personal power, which lies in responsibility. Creating with the power of thoughts/intent opens them to abundance. When they become so fully in the ‘flow’ they can tap into creative energy at any given time, to the point that they no longer need anything.
Behaviour: When balanced, they learn from their mistakes by claiming responsibility, by undoing it and starting again. When out of balance, they are easily overwhelmed with getting everything ‘right’; obsessed with making things perfect or making the perfect choices. Because of this, their creative energy becomes stifled; it builds into critical pressure, and creates a reverse flow of energy, which causes stress, tension and compromises health.
Core issues: They often do not recognize the power of their creations and abilities. Even though they have great ability to create, they have equal difficulty channelling it into practicality in their lives; therefore they may struggle to make a living with what they create. They tend to create behind the scenes, such as assistants to executives, coaches for professionals.
Core belief: They believe that when they hold power it means that they are not allowed to make mistakes. Because they tend to think that there is a lack of resources, and with a lack of self-worth, they forget that they are God.
Practice: “You have absolutely no choice but to create your own reality, because that is who you are. You must allow yourself to be who you are. This is about you giving yourself permission, all the time, to create, to experience, to live and reap the benefits of your creations.” ~ Masiandia
Grace (Harmony)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to walk in harmony with all things, to strengthen their connection to universal energy that runs between and connects all things. This connection allows for a deep understanding of time, space and energy.
Behaviour: When balanced, they have an ability to look for the largest picture possible for they have a profound need to see/feel how everything is connected. They see the inter-dimensional parts of everyone and everything, and internally know the truth when they hear, see or experience it in any form. They are not interested in the secrets of life; they want to know the secrets of the universe. When out of balance, they get wrapped up in people’s drama. They have a profound propensity to help others, but feel very useless in the face of their negativity.
Core issues: They are disposed to feeling uncomfortable in their bodies, and long to return ‘home’. Some even spend the majority of energy trying to find their way back home, thus they neglect their health; they deny their earthly needs.
Core belief: Because they have a tendency to get caught in the illusion, they feel separate from others, and see in the world the severance of union, which greatly saddens them. Hence, they are inclined to feel desperately alone. They may feel like they have a handicap that no one else has.
Practice: “There is no place like home, and home is where the heart is. In actuality, you are so far away from home, and home is looking for you. Become the beacon of light that shows ‘home’ the way to you. Your spirit family is looking for you. Of course you are not lost to them; they are simply separate because you don’t allow them in close to you, for you ‘think’ that you are unworthy because you are not with them. But you are with them, you are always with them, and they want you to know that. Your greatest joy comes from communicating and working directly with spirit consciousness at all times.” ~ Masiandia
Integrity (Authenticity)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to walk in harmony by aligning the different aspects of self into one single vibrational line of integrity. The four line of vibration: Speech, Action, Thoughts, and Beliefs need to be aligned within their energy field, in order to connect with their higher-self.
Behaviour: When balanced, their transition of energy, communication and authenticity is congruent and effortless. When out of balance, they are prone to having difficulty expressing themselves clearly. They are easily confused, and have a tendency to speak one way yet feel another, and wonder why others do not understand them.
Core issues: They may develop a dislike and distrust in words/communication, yet be fascinated by the desire to connect with others, be seen, understood, heard and most of all appreciated. When they are in harmony with themselves and others, they are positive influences, thus attracting people who want the best for them. However, this is compromised when they loose faith in themselves as they have difficulty appreciating themselves. Their incoherence attracts attention, though negative. They can become addicted to remaining out of congruency because it attracts attention nonetheless.
Core belief: They have a profound belief that they can make a significant difference in the world, yet don’t understand why others don’t get it. They may over-identify with a false sense of confidence when broadcasting incongruent energy. Conversely, they can believe that they are not trustworthy.
Practice: “Being authentic with your word means that you must speak less to say more. Focus on learning communication and saying more until you learn how to say less with efficiency and grace. Communication can be so simple when you let it. You are on a spiritual path of transforming the way mankind uses language to raise the vibration of earth, to finally allow for greater telepathy. Learn to listen in between the words in order to hear so much more, than your communication will be much smoother.” ~ Masiandia
Love (Transformation)
To see and experience love, one must be able to experience the direct opposite: the vacuum that is left when no love is present. It is experienced as the emotion of fear. Fear is the base of lack, origin of all negative emotion. Love is the base of all universal energy, which all energy emanate from. ~ Steve Rother
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to develop the ability to love themselves unconditionally, first, and thus transform fear. When self is clear and filled with love, others are attracted to be a part of that.
Behaviour: When balanced they are a temple of love, where everyone who enters is replenished, including themselves. When out of balance, they struggle between the dark and light polarities; pulled into opposite ends of emotions. They can get seduced by emotional highs, and negativity, and become unable to discern with conscious thought or awareness. Sometimes, their gift of affection can be motivated by the fear of being alone.
Core issues: Depression, loneliness and starving for nourishment, lulls them into feeling deeply disconnected from Source. They are easily un-grounded, derailed and at times offended by people’s ignorance. The fear of the world can compound their fear strengthening the belief that the world is not a nourishing place.
Core belief: They assume that they are unworthy and alone in the world. There is a belief that they cannot be whole unless another completes them, thus they remain in fear; separating themselves from others, or they struggle to get their needs met.
Practice: “Light and dark are all part of the whole. A landscape could not be defined without shadows, nor could be your personality or any of your life experiences. You are whole in your separateness. Your life-task is to balance, nourish, care for and compliment all the differing sides of your personality. Accept who you are, and in so doing you accept others. Love yourself and love overflows onto others; it’s inevitable. There is no lesson; no practice to learn to love oneself, there is simply the profound need to be loved that is not satiated until you love yourself.”~ Masiandia
Trust (Trusting Self)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to learn to follow themselves, to trust in their own leadership. When they trust themselves first, then they can rely on other people’s guidance. With trust, they can allow themselves to be vulnerable, and turn weaknesses into strengths. Biggest lesson is to trust in God/dess within. They need to develop the belief that they can do anything when they apply themselves, and thus open themselves to encouragement and support.
Behaviour: When balanced, they flow with universal energy. When out of balance, they have difficulty being vulnerable, and it can be challenging for them to trust anyone, least of all themselves, especially if they have developed trust issues early in life due to painful experiences. If they received a positive early childhood catalyst, such as parents that encouraged and reassured them, then they tend to be the people that teach others about trust.
Core issues: They have difficulty accepting and holding their own power. With a lack of trust there is a lack of faith, which creates a lack of connection with others and nature.
Core belief: They are prone to think that the world is unsafe and distrustful, thus they may feel alienated and alone. They can be extremely critical towards themselves, and develop phobias.
Practice: “Practice lying to yourself, and then ask yourself if it’s really true. When you tell yourself that someone is not behaving the way they should, or that you are not doing what you’re supposed to do, or that life is not flowing in the right direction, is that true? And then practice saying the truth, does is sound false, is it frightening? Brace yourself for a storm, is everything falling apart around you. Is it possible that you’re actually ok, and safe, and loved?” ~ Masiandia
Truth (True To Self)
Lesson: People with this life lesson need to understand that truth is based entirely on their own perception, and that it is through the art of shifting perception that they can see many truths beyond their own. They must be brutally honest with themselves, which means taking full responsibility for their own thoughts and actions.
Behaviour: When balanced, they are conduits for healing and positive catalysts in their families, relationships and work environments. They are seekers, always looking for answers to their questions; therefore enabling them to problem solve situations. When out of balance, they have a tendency to doubt themselves, denying their own impressions, feelings and thoughts. They judge themselves for what they think others may be thinking of them, and are inclined to measure themselves against others.
Core issues: It is difficult for them to stand in their own truth, thus they tend to adopt the truth of others in place of their own. They can create illusions to rationalize their choices, and in many cases they may live in a fantasy world. This creates a problem with being honest with others and with themselves.
Core belief: They are inclined to believe that being truthful won’t get them what they want, that people won’t like them for who they really are, to such a point that they oftentimes do not know what they want.
Practice: “When you disguise your value behind a false façade of confidence, which looks a lot more like arrogance, are you happy? Are you at peace? Are you really? Your work is to search the heavens for peace, practice peace, embrace peace and pass it n to others. Therefore ‘be’ the ‘teacher’ that you are. Be the teacher of peace.” ~ Masiandia